By: Sebastian
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It was Wednesday afternoon at St. Peter’s Hospital. Operating theatre sister Fiona Jones was arranging schedules in her office when Mr. Redman, the senior Neuro–surgeon, who said he wanted to talk about a delicate matter, interrupted her. “Next Monday,” he began, “I am to try out a new type of transplant operation which will bring a great deal of money to the hospital if it is successful. It will go on for a long time, although I cannot be sure how long but it will certainly be much longer than anything we are doing at the moment. We are getting into a completely unknown area and I have been thinking about ways to guard against anything going wrong. One of the precautions I want to take against nurses needing to leave the theatre before the end is to use only nurses with exceptionally large bladders, and I have to ask you whether St. Peter’s can provide them.”
Fiona had never had this request before and was at first offended. “There have never been any problems at this hospital with nurses being unable to last through operations.” She said, “It is a matter of pride amongst the staff that they have built up their endurance to meet all the demands placed upon them.” “True” replied Mr. Redman “but we are getting into a completely new ball game here and have to think how we will cope with an ultra long operation.” Fiona was still put out but she had the presence of mind to ask him how big the team would be. Mr. Redman replied that there would be him, a registrar acting as junior surgeon, an anesthetist, two senior theatre nurses and one junior. Fiona asked who the anesthetist was to be and was told that it was likely to be Audrey Fairweather. “A bad choice if you are looking for good bladder control” said Fiona; “you will find that Ruth Powell may be new to St. Peter’s, but she has already shown that her bladder gives her far greater endurance than poor old Audrey. The nurses are no problem,” continued Fiona, “I will be one of the seniors because quite frankly you will not find anyone better equipped than I am to meet a challenge like this. Mary Robinson will be the other senior and Helen McCarthy the junior because I know them both to be very well able to meet your requirements.” Fiona bore in mind that Helen had by far the best bladder control among the young nurses and needed a toilet very infrequently whatever the circumstances. What Fiona also knew well was that she and Mary went back many years to when they were both students together and both had really big bladders even then, with Mary’s the biggest amongst the student nurses. But that situation did not please Fiona who was competitive in all things and had never met anyone who needed the ladies’ less often than she did. She determined to overtake Mary and so started holding on till she was bursting and then holding on some more, and by constantly doing pelvic floor exercises gradually built up her capacity over a long period until it was even larger than Mary’s. When Mary realized that she had been overtaken she started on the same regime and although she gradually built up a superbly trained bladder, capable of really heroic feats of endurance, it was never quite a match for Fiona’s. Sometimes the two of them spent the evening in the bar of the St Peter’s Social Club each drinking pint after pint after pint of shandy with the purpose of confirming to anyone drinking with them (and to each other) just what a large volume of liquid they could get down their throats before they could not postpone a trip to the ladies a moment longer. Four times out of five it was Mary who had to go first, but whichever of them it was would be occupying a cubicle for a very long time while her swollen bladder steadily discharged its contents. It was a point of pride for both Mary and Fiona that neither of them would get up during the night and Mary’s husband Colin always loved it when Mary had spent the evening drinking because hearing Mary’s early morning piss splashing endlessly into the en suite toilet was an unfailing turn on for him. In turn his rampant desire and iron hard erection guaranteed some super sex for Mary. The following Monday dawned bright and clear and the surgical team began assembling ready for an 8 a.m. start. There was Fiona who was 38, red haired, tall and skinny with small breasts and Mary also 38 of average height but a little overweight and with black hair. Then there was Helen the third nurse who was 24 and had a really bubbly outgoing personality and finally Ruth the anesthetist who was the oldest of them at 48 and the shortest at 5ft 3inches. The registrar who was to be assistant surgeon was Jane Frodsham, who was tall and auburn and brainy, and at 31 was said to be a rising star at St Peters’. Jane knew from bitter experience that long operations really tested her bladder endurance, so she had drunk very little over the preceding 24 hours. She heard Fiona say to Mary and Helen “This will be a long one and we won’t have a chance for anything to drink till it’s over. I hope you remembered that at breakfast time and took extra liquid on board to guard against dehydration.” They both nodded and Ruth said “Me as well.” Jane was astounded and thought to herself “But if I did that I wouldn’t last three hours.” The transplant got under way and went well at first. Then Dr. Redman hit the first of a series of difficulties and progress slowed right down. He and Jane were working as fast as they could, but as soon as they overcame one problem another appeared. Time was going on and they were dropping further and further behind their schedule. It was nearly 3pm. before they could say to the others “It’s going better now. We could be finished in an hour.” Jane was really pleased that the end was in sight because she had been getting increasing pain from her bladder for some time, and her situation was now desperate. Steadily she worked on, having to concentrate hard not to think about her overloaded bladder but sure that she could hold out for the short time till they were finished. But then there was a flash of activity. Something was badly wrong; Dr. Redman was shouting to the nurses to give him more clamps and quickly. A long and messy repair had to be carried out and the only way Jane was able to get through was because she was so busy; she did not have a moment to think about the torment her bladder was in. By now it was 5:30 and Jane was far from alone in struggling with her need for a toilet. Over the last couple of hours all the other women in the theatre had been aware of an increasing need, gradually passing into an overwhelming need to urinate. Fiona looked round with concern thinking that if her own splendid bladder had become so painful, what must the others be like? Fortunately the problems that had surfaced in the afternoon had all been overcome and the operation was moving into its last stages and the final sewing up of the incision could be made. Each of the girls could recognize in the others tell tale signs that they were all in the same boat; fidgeting although trying not to show it, gritting their teeth or biting their lips so as to distract themselves from the agonizing pain of their bladders, which was getting worse and worse. Mary noticed Fiona crossing her legs as she stood at the instrument table and thought to herself “Bet that’s the effect of that pint tea mug she uses at breakfast.” The one thing that got them through was the determination not to be the first to let Dr. Redman down and somehow each of them ignored the overwhelming need to empty their massively distended bladders until the sewing up was complete and at 6:40pm Dr. Redman said, “That’s it. Thank you very much. We are finished at last.” The nearest ladies toilet was only just down the corridor from the operating theatre, and they rushed to it. Jane found she was jostling Helen in an attempt to get there that little bit faster but in a moment they were all inside. Ruth was last because she had to take small steps to avoid wetting herself. This toilet had six cubicles so there was plenty of room for all of them (and one spare). Jane was first in getting into a cubicle, snatched down her trousers and pants in one movement, sat down and at last could relax that sphincter muscle that had been under such pressure for so long. A strong stream poured out of her and jetted against the inside of the toilet bowl to the accompaniment of her usual loud hiss. Within seconds Jane heard another hiss on her left hand side. Jane was elated that she had not disgraced herself and had held out even though she had been in such pain and thought to herself that the loudness of her hiss just showed what pressure she had held back. But while the noise she was making remained constant the hiss from her left was steadily increasing in loudness and intensity, reaching a level of urgency and insistence that showed that whoever was producing it was sending a great gushing torrent of piss jetting against the toilet bowl. Jane continued relieving herself with her own sound being almost drowned out by the mega decibels coming from her left which continued on loudly and steadily thirty seconds from when she started. Jane’s hissing stopped and for a few more seconds she finished off with a decreasing stream; which splashed straight into the water. She wiped herself and flushed the toilet and came out to wash her hands and all the time the noise of the furious cascade of piss continued, only tailing off and turning into a dribble as Jane was drying her hands. The toilet flushed, the door of the cubicle opened and young nurse Helen appeared. “Oh how I needed that,” she said. “I felt as though my bladder was the size of a football.” She quickly washed and dried her hands and asked Jane “Coming?” “No I’ll wait for the others,” replied Jane who had been amazed by Helen’s tremendous bladder capacity and a part of her just had to find out if Helen was unique, or whether Fiona, Ruth, or Mary could possibly match her. These three had started relieving themselves at virtually the same moment as Helen and Jane, each of the three of them releasing a strong steady stream to splash down into the water in the toilet bowl. Jane had been aware of this in the background all the time and so knew that they had already been pissing for a long time. She was now was able to concentrate on the regular gushing coming from behind the three closed doors as the three women continued to ease the pressure on their grossly overfull bladders. All Jane could hear was the three uniform streams splashing and splashing and splashing continuously down into the water in the lavatory pans. Jane’s reaction was a mixture of amazement that the three of them had not yet emptied their bladders completely after all this time, and envy about the colossal capacity they were displaying. The even flow went on and on and on cascading into the toilet bowls without any sign of tailing off and Jane began to realize that she was hearing bladders every bit as large as Helen’s and probably even exceeding her immense size. The noise of their interminable cascades of piss echoed round and round the bare walls of the ladies, swelling the level of sound so that it was hard to believe that there were just three of them. Only when it seemed that the unwavering streams were to go on forever did Jane hear one taper off and die away. A toilet flushed and then she was joined by Ruth who was so pleased with herself that her trusty bladder had enabled her to last the course and survive her ordeal. As Ruth washed her hands she turned to Jane and said “I thought that I had an exceptional bladder, and it was more painful than it has ever been before and yet those two are leaving me way behind.” They waited for Mary and Fiona, believing that they must finish at any moment, but could hear that they were both still pissing as strongly as ever, their regular streams going on splashing into the toilets as steadily as when they started over two minutes ago. It was forty seconds from when Ruth finished before Mary slowed to a trickle and stopped, leaving Fiona alone continuing to urinate. Then suddenly she stopped as well, but only for a moment before starting up again not quite as strongly as before for another 20 seconds and then ending with a series of squirts of decreasing length as she contracted her bladder muscles to squeeze out the last remaining contents. When she emerged from her cubicle she said, “The things we do for this hospital. We have all been in agony for hours and all we will get for it is a thank you.” Mary replied “Yes, and no one else but us could have done it. No one else can exercise bladder control the way we do.” A few minutes later Jane was walking across to the car park with Dr. Redman and telling him something of the heroic bladder exploits of the other women. “I could never match them,” complained Jane “Their capacity is in a completely different league to mine. I only lasted out because I had drunk so little over the last 24 hours.” “Let me tell you something Jane,” said Dr. Redman. “I prescribed myself a diuretic which I took yesterday evening. It had the desired effect and I peed continually then, leaving very little for today. It was the only way I could be sure of coping. You did very well, I never saw your concentration waver, and Fiona carefully chose the others because of their phenomenal bladder control. From what I have heard their bladders are unmatched in this hospital.” “Unmatched in any hospital in the land I’d say” replied Jane (Unless, gentle reader, you know otherwise.)
Sebastian